Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Why Inkheart the Video Game is like my cold
Well, I finally got it this year. If I hear one more person say "Yeah, there's a really nasty bug going around right now" I will shoot them. Can you honestly remember, in the past two years, when you didn't hear someone say "there's something nasty going around?". It's the nature of the nasty.
Speaking of nasty, I played "Inkheart" for the Nintendo DS yesterday while waiting at the doctor's office so she could tell me about it "going around". You can read my full review at the Armchair Empire sometime in the next week or so, but until then, here's a summary.
Much like my nose this morning, this game blows. The animation of the main character sprites reminded me of the Amiga computer from 1985. When I say it reminded me, I meant that it reminded me that the animation that came out on the Amiga was better than this 2009 release. I wish I was joking.
So like my cold, this game made me ache. It was painful. Like a train wreck, I couldn't help staring at the animation to make sure what I was seeing was real. It felt like a dream. A dream from 1983.
Germans made this? I stared in disbelief. I like Germans, they usually make good things. I was thinking German, so when I sneezed on my DS, I said "Gesundheit!" and the sad part is that my screen looked better after the sneeze. Unbelievable.